 You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon'.
-- Chris Rock |
Nobody believes the official spokesman, but everybody trusts an unidentified source.
-- Ron Nesen |
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
-- Noel Coward |
All animals are equal but some animals are more equal than others.
-- George Orwell |
Have you noticed that all the people in favour of birth control are already born?
-- Benny Hill |
The less people know about how sausages and laws are made, the better they'll sleep at night.
-- Otto von Bismarck |
A person will sometimes devote all his life to the development of one part of his body - the wishbone.
-- Robert Frost |
A recent survey stated that the average person's greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you're telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.
-- Jerry Seinfield |
People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.
-- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard |
Common looking people are the best in the world: that is the reason the Lord makes so many of them.
-- Abraham Lincoln |
